I had a blast at Write2ignite (as always) and came away encouraged by many things.
Two of my stories were read during the First Pages. I received some great feedback, encouraging comments with some “ouch, that stings, but they have a point!” moments, too.
Saturday afternoon, I ended up having about a minute to pitch a few of my projects (including the “first pages” projects) to an agent at the conference. It was an experience I needed and ended up with a “green light” to submit some of my work.
I also had a lightbulb moment. I need help. (Yeah, yeah. So you already knew that. But let me finish explaining…) I taught a workshop during the conference, and received some wonderful and insightful feedback. Everyone I talked to was gracious and said they learned a lot from the workshop. But I knew, as I was teaching, that I was full of fear.
As much as I love talking one-on-one, and as much as I love singing … I always experience anxiety when I talk or sing in front of a crowd. When teaching the workshop, I was covered in that same fear. And believe me, it showed.
Fear of talking or singing in front of a crowd can be a real handicap…and not only when I lead writing workshops. Did I mention I’m one of the worship leaders at our church’s early service? My fear can get in the way of the work that needs to be done. My fear can get in the way of the creative process. My fear can get in the way of everything!
I am learning to let God move me out of the way, so I can move in His spirit and His leading. And this learning process isn’t easy. The very thing I know I’m called to do is also the very place in my life I have allowed fear to take root.
So today, I’m making a decision.
I’m grabbing the bull by the horns and digging my spurs in the dirt. This fear isn’t going to throw me out of the ring. I need to remember one thing: I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me. And that includes conquering the bull of fear.
What fear do you need to grab by the horns? What fear has kept you from jumping in the ring? What fear has chased you from the fight?