writing for children

Mess, Shmess… We All Got Some

Have you ever walked into someone’s home and thought, “Well, this is spotless. They are NEVER coming to my house!”

BIG mistake. Perhaps their house is so perfectly clean you could lick their floors, take a bath in their mop water and roll around in their flower bed without getting a speck of dirt on you – but I guarantee their lives are not nearly that perfect. We make assumptions about folks and apply it to all the places we can’t even see. If we see a spotless living room, we assume the rest of their life must be, too. But everyone has mess hidden somewhere.

YES. Everyone has mess.

You didn’t think you were the only one, did you?

You know what I’m talking about, right? The places in your life that just aren’t “right” yet. The places we like to keep hidden from everyone else.

Maybe you still lose your temper too much.

Maybe you call yourself stupid everyday.

If you are a teenager, maybe you think you won’t ever live up to your parents’ expectations. Or maybe you think your parents are as dumb as dirt. Or maybe you’ve gotten yourself into some messy situations and you don’t want anyone to know… but you NEED them to know.

Okay, men – maybe you feel like a failure because you haven’t loved your wife as Christ loves the church. Or maybe you treat your wife or girlfriend like a queen, but you feel it never seems to be enough. Maybe you have been online looking at things you shouldn’t. Maybe you’ve secretly hated who you are for years… but make sure everyone else thinks you have it all together.

And women, perhaps you feel like a failure because you haven’t lived up to the verses in Proverbs 31:10-31 – or as I like to call them, the “Make-me-laugh-so-hard-I-cry” and “Are you serious about this Lord?” verses. (The Lord and I have already had this conversation, so He knows where I’m at with those proverb verses right now. And He loves me anyway. So you have to, too. Yes. You do. It says so in the Bible. Right here: John 13:34)

Perhaps you put everyone first, but secretly resent it.

For both parties – maybe, you have buried yourself under “what you do” and forgotten who you ARE. Or perhaps you think you have it all together and everyone else needs to live up to your standards.

Or just maybe, you feel like you are the worst: parent, sister, brother, friend, housekeeper, bookkeeper, floorsweeper or beekeeper that has ever walked the earth because you don’t have it all together.

So why don’t we share with others the mess we’re muddling through? Why don’t we reach out to others and share those places where we need help?

Is it not knowing where to turn? Is it pride? Is it fear?

Only the Lord knows. But He gives clear instruction that we should share our burdens and the burdens of our sisters and brothers… and confess our MESS to one another. You don’t have to stand in the church and tell every single person what’s going on with you. But having a core group of believers you trust and can share with is important. Jesus had about a dozen or so close friends… and three of them were his closest friends. Remember? J

Don’t let the spotless kitchen (or not so spotless kitchen) stop you from reaching out. Every kitchen still has germs! J And The Lord created us for fellowship. Our Pastor said that fellowship has NOT happened if we have not shared our joys and concerns with one another. (That’s a kick in the pants, ain’t it?)

So what are you waiting on? (btw – that is not a random kitchen sink above. It is a pic of MY kitchen sink. I hope you’ll still come to see me!)

James 5:9, 13-20

9: Don’t grumble against one another, brothers and sisters, or you will be judged. The Judge is standing at the door!

13 Is anyone among you in trouble? Let them pray. Is anyone happy? Let them sing songs of praise. 14 Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven. 16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.

17 Elijah was a human being, even as we are. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years. 18 Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops.

19 My brothers and sisters, if one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring that person back, 20 remember this: Whoever turns a sinner from the error of their way will save them from death and cover over a multitude of sins.


14 thoughts on “Mess, Shmess… We All Got Some

  1. Good food for thought this week of feasting, Donna. You’re so right. We all have some mess. Also love how you point out that fellowship is about sharing concerns and joys. Sometimes we neglect to share in the joy of others, don’t we?

    Have a wonderful Thanksgiving with family and friends!


  2. What a wonderful post. Donna, we’ve talked privately about this before, but my biggest grief are my kids. They fight and bicker in a way that goes beyond sibling rivalry. How did this happen? I am often at a loss as to how to stop it without turning into a nightmare mother. I want to foster love. And so I ask that you keep my family in your prayers because I struggle with this immensely.

    I am thankful for your friendship and wise words, dear friend. Have a very happy and blessed Thanksgiving with your family and friends.


    1. Vijaya,

      I sooooo wish we lived even closer! I have similar issues with my precious girls. They argue and nit-pick at everything. It is definitely a part of my life that I wish was less of a mess! 🙂

      The good news is this: God has His hands all over that situation. He hasn’t let go of our dear ones and He won’t! I was reminded of that two weekends ago at a women’s retreat. I needed to hear it then… and I’m sharing it with you, now! 🙂

      We have GOT to get together soon!


  3. thank you for putting this in words. it must have been tough to write!

    it encouraged me today though and so I am glad you shared what God put on your heart!!


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