Breaking Chains

When I was pregnant with my first child, I experienced a panic attack for the first time ever. At the time, I didn’t know what it was. I felt like I was going to die… yet I could breathe as normally as I am now. It was as if I was being smothered by pure fear. I felt chained! I wasn’t… but that’s how it felt.

I had people praying for me (mainly my mama!) and came through the first attack, thinking it would be the only one. I did have a few more during that first pregnancy, and they disappeared after her birth. But they returned during my second and third pregnancies. I was so thankful not to have many attacks during those times, but I had enough to learn something very intimately…

There is power in the name of Jesus.

During those nights, when I woke up in a sweat and feeling like the room was going to close in on me, I walked out of the house and stood in the fresh air… unable to utter anything but the name of Jesus. Over and over again I whispered his name into the dark of night. And every time — the fear that had been shaking me to the core disappeared. EVERY TIME. It washed over me like the waves on the shore, destroying what had paralyzed me.

I didn’t have a rehearsed prayer. I didn’t have a well-thought out rebuttal to the faceless-fear that gripped me. But I didn’t have to. In the midst of the attack on my mind, emotions and my body…. I whispered the name above all names. Jesus… Jesus… Jesus. Over and over and over again.

I shouldn’t have been surprised — but I was. Just speaking His name brought peace to my heart and drove away the darkness. I am still in awe.

It’s been many moons since I’ve had that type of fear grip me. But there have been many more occasions that I’ve lifted the name of Jesus as my only prayer. His name is sometimes the only word that crosses my lips — and His name is more than sufficient! Just as it says in Romans 8:26, “In the same way, the Spirit also helps us in our weakness, since we do not know how to pray as we should. But the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans too deep for words.”

I know that there is power in the name of Jesus… a power I can’t comprehend, no matter how I try. It can’t be explained. I can only share my experience in hopes that it encourages someone in some way, to reach out to Jesus knowing that He will bring hope to the midst of despair and peace in the midst of fear.

And this song… this song sums up my post. 🙂

 

 

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